Can No Longer Run, No Longer Hide
by Goodbye Mr WoIf
Summary: Thea has been ill consistently for the past few weeks, but her illness is taking a deadly turn.
1. You Can Say What You Want

The thick grass crunched with frost under Thea's feet as she hiked her way to Martha's house, Anna tagging slowly behind her. The frigid air wrecked her lungs as she breathed which only rattled her chest more. The cough that had been haunting her for days now was only made worse by the frozen atmosphere that loomed dark and haunting all around them. Martha trotted down from her house to meet the other girls and they greeted each other with a nod, no words were spoken, as the effort was too great and all words could wait until the warmth of the school house. Thea shook with cold, all the shawls and winter coats in her house had not been enough to warm her up, even the warmed potatoes she held in her pockets seemed to do her no good, though she gripped them tightly.

Only when the three girls entered the school house did they dare let out a breath. The first few mornings of winter were always the worst, their blood was still used to the mild autumns. Thea watched as Martha and Anna stripped off their coats and scarves, but she stood stock still wrapped in her cocoon.

"I am still absolutely freezing, I don't know how you can just throw your coats away so easily!" They shrugged and Thea's teeth chattered and she gingerly removed her coat, keeping her mittens, scarf and muffler wrapped tightly. The rush of cool air through the thin fabric of her dress was unwanted and she tensed up.

"Relax, Thea. I'm positive Frau Thoens threw some wood in the fireplace, she would be crazed not to!" Martha linked her arm in Thea's and dragged her to her seat, a few minutes left before class actually begun. Thea coughed, uninterested as she watched Anna and Martha in deep conversation over the awful state of the weather outside and Georg's new haircut. Her cough turned into a hack and she grabbed her hanky from her pocket and held it politely to her mouth. No one else as much as flinched as she drew it away and gasped. Thea's head snapped up, in a panic, just in time to see Frau Thoens rap her knuckles against the chalkboard--ready to begin.

Anna turned and faced forward, every other girl in the class doing the same, eyes locked on the Professor, fingers ready to numbly scribble out any notes. But Thea's eyes were directed downward and they were slowly welling up with tears. Blood. Spots of blood dotted the fabric that she grasped in her fingers, an awful sign. The hacking cough had been plaguing her for weeks, her mother and father blaming it on the changing weather, the frigid air that she breathed while she slept. Thea's mind wandered, as she pushed her hanky into a pocket in her dress.

"Thea!" Thea looked up at the harsh whisper of her name, and the whole class of girls stared back at her. Martha nudged her with her arm, "Frau asked you a question!"

Thea sputtered nervously and sat up straighter in her chair.

"I am sorry, Frau, I was engaged in a previous lesson." She studied the chalkboard, eyes wide, trying to figure out what exactly she had been asked. Latin scribbles filled the boards of the other girls, and Thea could just make out the writing on Anna's in front of her. She rose from her seat, eyes still squinting at Anna's writing board.

"Eram?"

"In the full sentence, please?" The strict professor said through gritted teeth.

"Um…ego eram infirmus."

"Correct." Frau Thoens scraped the chalk across the board to scribble out Thea's answer. "And, Fraulein Thea, I expect your full attention in the current lesson. There will be a test on this later on."

"Yes, Frau Thoens. I apologize." Thea slumped back in her chair, relieved at her quick thinking. Next to her, Martha reached out to get Thea's attention.

"Are you okay? You never drift off in lessons..."

Thea turned to her and nodded gently then jerked her head away quickly as she felt another round of her horrific cough come on. She grabbed her balled up hanky and coughed violently into it, shoulders shaking with each catch of her breath. She felt Martha's hand on her back, rubbing it gently. As the coughing ceased, Thea pulled the fabric away and glanced at it. Clean as a whistle. She closed her eyes and smiled quietly in relief, it was a one-time occurrence, a fluke. It was truly the wintery air, too cold for snow, that caused her throat to be rubbed raw.

She looked back to the front of room, and caught Martha out of the corner of her eye staring at her.

"I'm fine."

Martha nodded convincingly enough, but Thea noted that she wiped her hand on the hems of her dress. The hand that had just been resting on Thea's back.


	2. But I Won't Change My Mind

Thea woke with a start. A dream. A bad, bad dream. A dream of blood rushing from her body, through her fingers, from her scalp. Her breath was halted and choked, as she felt the deadly coughing spell take over her body again. She curled into a tiny ball in her bed, hacking horrendously into her nightgown sleeve. Thea squeezed her eyes shut as the coughing subsided, but was wide awake. These awful nightmares had plagued her consistently for the past few days, ever since the episode in class. Eyes still squeezed shut, Thea uncurled herself from her ball and sat up against her headboard, ready to inspect the damage. With only the moonlight to reveal her secrets, Thea cracked open her eyes and peered down at her white sleeve. Speckled with red. Dotted with blood. Her breathing stopped again, bile rising in her throat. Not again, Thea threw her heavy blankets off of her legs. Not again. She swung her feet onto the cold wooden floor and padded as quietly as she could across to the basin full of water, a small fire burning underneath it to keep it warm. Before she hit her destination, the young girl collapsed on the floor, body heaving with yet another fit.

"Thea?"

She snapped her head up, hearing her name called from across the hall. It took everything in her, but she made a point to swallow back the coughing and run back to her bed, hiding the offending sleeve under her blankets, just in time for the door to be thrown open, her mother running over to the bed.

"Thea, dear, was that a cough?" Thea's mother slapped a hand over her forehead, feeling for a fever. "You're rather warm, dear."

She slid her hand under her leg, to push out any thought of even gesturing with it. With the clean white sleeve, Thea pushed her mother's hand from her head.

"I'm fine, Mama. Just the cold air bothering me…nothing more." She choked back another cough. "I promise." Thea added as an unconvincing afterthought.

"If you say so." Her mother backed up a step and took hold of her free hand. "Ever since that Eberhardt Scherer passed from that awful consumption…eleven years old, Thea." She shook her head. "But if you say everything Is alright…back to bed. School in the morning, dear."

Thea nodded, blinking back tears, biting down fiercly on her lip.

"Goodnight, Mama."

As her mother tip-toed from the room, closing the door behind her, Thea held her hands to her face in utter despair, willing herself not to cry out.

Consumption. How had she not seen the signs? The blood. Oh God, the blood. She held her sleeve to the moonlight. Droplets, spatters. Again, she rolled out of bed, and thrust her awful, horrendous arm into the basin of warm water and scrubbed. The brown drops had dissolved into light pink splotches. Good enough for now. The large clock in the kitchen donged out four. Thea fell back into bed, consumed with her thoughts of this disease, something she knew next to nothing about.

It was an exhausting effort to fall back asleep, but Thea awoke the next day with a cold, still damp sleeve. The innocence and tranquility of waking up were ruined instantly by the aggressive return of the awful thoughts of disease. And death. She shook the thought from her head and changed out of her nightgown and into the warmest possible dress she owned., shoving the soiled nightgown under her mattress.

"Just a cold." Thea whispered to herself as she finger combed her hair back into braids. A hacking cough arose in her throat, sending her body into violent spasms. "A very, very bad cold."

One step out the door, and the frail girl's body tensed up. The wintery chill had definitely set in overnight, and a layer of frost covered the grass, thicker than before, poking her ankles as she struggled to reach the road, which was slick and wet. Up ahead, Anna waited, fiddling with her scarf as she watched Thea trudge closer.

"Good morning, Thea!" Thea winced. Instead of a hello, Anna received a small nod.

"I said good morning, Thea!" Anna skipped up along-side her friend, in the annoying way she always did if she was ignored. The burst of movement on the slippery ground caused Anna's feet to be thrown into the air and her body to be smacked onto the road. Thea barely turned to see the event and continued walking.

"Thea!" Anna yelled obscenely loud for the hour, from her spot on the ground. "Owww." She rubbed her elbow and hollered again at Thea, who turned. "Help me!"

Thea exhaled sharply and walked, expressionless to help her friend up with her multiple gloved hands.

"Are you okay?"

"Well, I'm fine now that you're speaking. Are you okay?" Anna brushed herself off.

"I'm fine..fine." The inhalation of breath made her cough, to which Anna turned her head away.

"Not in my face! You've been breathing down my neck all week in class, I don't want what you've got!"

"I haven't got anything." Thea began the turn toward's Martha's house, their usual route in the morning, but Anna pulled Thea away from the street, and instead turning towards the school.

"Martha isn't going to school today. She's sick."

Thea stopped walking and grabbed tightly to Anna's arm who gave her a look of surprise.

"She's sick?"


End file.
